26 replies to this topic

[redlion]

tl;dr YART

Long distance isn't really my thing. /contribution to thread

[Nanarie]

I think that advice depends on the person.

Does it hold some merit? To a point, I guess.

Personally, I HATED it when my friends suggested I see other people because I saw my current boyfriend every one-two months for the past three years.

We're not even long distance--he lives about 15 minutes away from me and we go to different schools; I'm just not allowed to date.

But from what I've seen, long distance relationships are more likely to fail if both people 'aren't on the same page', like if the girlfriend cares about a social life more than the guy does, or the guy is more interested in partying than the girl does, etc. Although two people can have different interests, sometimes its the things that they love that tear them apart because they don't want to have to 'change' to make the other person happy. I think it's more about situations that involve trust, such as hanging out with a male/female best friend or going to a club. Which is probably why long-distance relationships don't really work out when viewed overall. o;

So I guess, yes, that advice could work if one or both partners aren't ready to settle down yet.

Personally, I wouldn't want to see what else is out there.
1) I might not find someone as stable and who knows what they already want.
2) It takes a long time for me to trust someone, and so I'd want to have a long-term relationship, and not everyone wants that.
3) I really don't like getting to know people on a more-than-friends level, too much work LMAO.

Ah, forgot to check the thread so I didn't see this. A lot of people say that me and my bf are "practically the same person". We have similar personalities, values, etc. We both used to have extreme trust issues due to a complicated past, but for the most part it's resolved. He still gets paranoid sometimes though.

Anyway yeah I agree with all your points. I was talking to my boyfriend last night and he was like, What if you got sent back to the past and you had a chance to start our friendship/relationship all over again? And I was like fuck that, too much work and he agreed.

And congratulations on being together for three (or more?) years! That really sucks that you can't date. I originally tried to keep my relationship a secret because I never talked to my parents about whether I was allowed one or not, but they kind of found out and and were like well whatever. So lucky for me.

Redlion, I had to look up what YART was and now that I found out I'd just like to say I'm sorry :x
Of course LDRs aren't anyone's thing, but thanks for your contribution.